Dental anxiety can affect both children and adults. Although modern techniques have made dental procedures more comfortable, kids may still feel nervous at the dentist because the environment is unfamiliar and they don’t know what to expect.
Children fear the dentist for many reasons, and sometimes it has nothing to do with the actual doctor. Oftentimes, all it takes is bringing kids to an unfamiliar environment for them to start fidgeting, but they can also struggle with accepting that they’re not in control of the situation and have to trust the dentist. If a child had an uncomfortable experience during a previous visit, they might expect similar discomfort next time and become reluctant to return.
To help your kids overcome their fears, they should describe how they feel and what they want, but words often don’t come easily. Here’s how to guide them into communicating their emotions.
Reveal to Them How the Visit Should Go
One of the most common reasons kids fear the dentist is uncertainty about what will be involved. When you bring your kid to the dentist for the first time, you can describe what the visit will be like so they know what to expect and can better manage their nervousness.
With small kids, the easiest way to do this is to play dentist and take turns pretending to be the dentist and the patient. As you play together, you may be able to figure out potential fears, such as when you ask them to stay still and they refuse. This would be a great starting point for a real conversation.
However, if this is the second or third time they’re going to the dentist and they still struggle, try another game: ask kids to draw a picture of the dentist’s office and analyze it together to figure out which part is scarier.
Help Them With Questions
If your description of the visit is still unhelpful, it’s time to start asking the right questions. Instead of making them come up with the right words, you can gather what’s wrong from how they answer or react. It may not be as simple as asking, “Why are you scared?” because it is too generic and can confuse them, so try to be specific.
At the same time, succeeding in this mission is difficult for the parent alone, so collaborating with the dentist is ideal; that’s why choosing an empathic one is best. Together with the dentist, you can help your child build the confidence to speak up and explain what is bothering them.
According to the practice leader at Perfect Smiles Dentistry in Everett, Washington, your role as a parent is very important in reducing your child’s fears. “Keeping a relaxed tone when speaking with children is essential to make them feel safe, but when you’re trying to help them, choose to ask open-ended questions rather than guessing or suggesting how they feel.”
Don’t assume kids don’t understand the issue because of their age, which is why making them aware of the dentist as soon as possible is ideal. In theory, you can bring your kid to the dentist within six months of their first tooth appearing and no later than their first birthday. But even if they are older, it’s never too late to build resilience. Consider booking appointments together; for example, Perfect Smiles Dentistry’s family dental team can often accommodate family members with back-to-back appointments on the same day.
Avoid Being Dismissive
One of the biggest mistakes parents make when trying to calm their kids is being dismissive in the hope they will magically realize their fears are unfounded. When you resort to “There’s nothing to be afraid of,” you’re practically putting a barrier between you and them, so they might start thinking there’s no need to talk to you about their concerns anymore.
Yes, it’s important to use positive language when talking to them, but when you say again, “You have to be brave,” instead of finding the reason for their fear, you may make them feel their concerns aren’t being heard. Try saying things in a fun way, like “We’re going to the dentist so they can clean your teeth and make them stronger”. If they like animals, you can tell them they’ll have teeth like a crocodile!
The wrong approach is to tell them things like “It won’t hurt” when the kid may feel discomfort in some cases and mistake it for pain. If your child worries about pain, let them know the dental team can use special techniques to manage it, such as local anesthesia.
Ask Them for a Review of the Visit
Finally, while the pre-dental session talk is important, ask how they felt at the dentist after the procedure. You can turn this into an opportunity to bond with the dentist by making jokes about their favorite superheroes having to go to the dentist too, so they feel more comfortable telling you how they felt.
However, you can wait until you’re home to ask them how they felt, what they liked and didn’t like, if the dentist was nice to them, etc. What’s most important is to watch out for your reaction upon hearing their opinion. Let them finish their sentence, listen carefully, and avoid reacting negatively if they say they didn’t like the experience. It can be hard to get it right the first time, so start again by asking the right questions to identify the real cause of their discomfort.
Ready to Turn Dental Visits Into Adventures?
The thought of going to the dentist scares even the bravest adults, so it is no wonder kids have a hard time with it too. But as a parent, you can shift the pattern and help your kids feel less afraid of dentists with simple steps like telling them what to expect and using positive language. The biggest mistake to avoid is dismissing their emotions; instead, ask specific questions before and after the visit and give them space to share what’s on their mind.
comments +