By Nubia DuVall Wilson

April is Child Abuse Prevention Month, a time when many of us share statistics, post awareness graphics, and reiterate the need to protect all children. One thing I’ve learned as a child sexual abuse (CSA) survivor myself is that knowledge of the prevalence in America alone is not enough for prevention. Preventing CSA requires something much harder: honest, informed, courageous, and ongoing conversations inside our homes and communities.

As a Black woman, a mother, and a survivor of sibling sexual abuse, I know firsthand how deeply uncomfortable and often silenced this topic can be in the Black community. For decades, we have been taught to protect the family name, “pray on it” when something goes wrong, and respect elders without question. But those same cultural norms can unintentionally create the very conditions that allow abuse to go undetected and unaddressed. Breaking that cycle means choosing to have conversations that may feel uncomfortable but are absolutely necessary for prevention.

When I read the Successful Black Parenting article, “New Study Reveals: Family Members Are The Leading Perpetrators Of Sexual Abuse Against Black Children,” it did not surprise me. Statistically (based on those who report, many do not, like myself), most children are not harmed by strangers. They are harmed by people they know, trust, and often love, and that reality makes prevention not just a community issue, but a parenting responsibility.

Prevention Starts at Home—Not After Something Happens

Too often, we think about child sexual abuse reactively (actions to take if it happens), but by then, the harm is already done. The conversations can be twofold: the “if it happens” talk enables parents to explain that prevention is what we do before harm occurs, and that proactive measures can be put in place to have a more positive impact. One of the reasons why I speak out is to bring awareness to the long-term effects of surviving these harmful acts; it stays with you forever, and the repercussions can be mentally and physically crippling. 

Prevention starts with parents and family members becoming educated about children’s development, safety planning, and identifying warning signs of vulnerable situations that put the children in their lives at risk.

It means helping adults understand that kids have the right to say no to any touch that feels unsafe or uncomfortable from adults or other children, and teaching children about body autonomy in age-appropriate ways. It requires creating a home environment where children feel safe asking questions and sharing concerns without fear of punishment or dismissal, and where adults take responsibility in communicating and sustaining safe and healthy boundaries.

Many of us were never taught how to have these conversations. We didn’t grow up hearing language like “safe touch” or “boundaries,” so we avoid the topic not because we don’t care, but because we don’t feel equipped to handle it. Avoiding the conversation doesn’t protect our children; it leaves them unprepared.

“As someone who has lived through this and committed my voice to prevention, I can tell you this: the conversations we avoid are often the ones our children need most.”

A Practical Tool Parents Can Use Right Now

One of the biggest questions I hear from parents is: “Where do I even start?” This is where research-backed, reputable resources that are accessible on your own time can make a real difference. 

The Circles of Safety training from Stop It Now! is one example of a tool designed specifically for parents and caregivers who want to be proactive, but may not know how. The training is self-paced and cost-effective, making it realistic for busy families. What I appreciate most is that it doesn’t just provide information, it builds confidence.

Through real-life scenarios, short quizzes, and practical tip sheets, it helps parents understand age-appropriate sexual behaviors, recognize concerning conduct in adults and children alike, identify risk factors, and practice responding. It also offers guidance on how to have ongoing, age-appropriate conversations with children—because this topic should be a continuous dialogue that evolves as children grow.

From Awareness to Action

In order to more proactively protect our children, we must move beyond awareness and into action, which means:

• Talking to our children early and often, from naming body parts to creating a set of guidelines and family rules that are reviewed with all family members for safe boundaries, respect, and privacy.
• Recognizing the difference between healthy, developmentally appropriate behaviors in children that parents reinforce versus unsafe, concerning, or even harmful behaviors that parents should respond to. 
• Creating environments where children feel safe speaking up by providing them with the language and empowerment to create boundaries for themselves.

As someone who has lived through this and committed my voice to prevention, I can tell you this: the conversations we avoid are often the ones our children need most. Don’t worry about having the perfect conversation. We cannot protect our children from what we fail to discuss with them. But when we choose to learn, to speak, and to listen, we give them something powerful: the tools to stay safe and the confidence to be heard.

About Nubia DuVall Wilson

Nubia DuVall Wilson is a nationally-recognized published author, anti-incest activist, and speaker who is using her voice to break the cycle of generational trauma and unsilence survivors of sexual abuse—especially sibling sexual abuse (SSA). In 2026, she became the Community Organizer for Incest AWARE Alliance. In May 2018, she published her second book, The Survivors Club, a supernatural novella inspired by her journey to heal as a survivor of sibling sexual abuse.

She is currently writing a memoir to raise more awareness for incest trauma & abuse and its impact on the Black community. Nubia graduated from Barnard College, Columbia University, with a degree in English and a minor in Religion. She lives in New Jersey with her family.  Learn more at www.nubiaduvall.com and follow on Substack, IG, and TikTok.